I want to go home. I hate it here. I hate being away from home and I hate always doing homework and never having any fun. I miss my friends I miss my family. And I feel like I’m going to fail every class, even though I’ll probably at this rate only fail one. But even if I did go home there aren’t any colleges that I want to go to where I could commute. I love Brockport’s campus but I hate dorming and being so far away. I’m dying. All I want to do is cry right now but I can’t because my room mate is here too. And do you know how weird it is living with three people you rarely talk to? I didn’t say one word to my suite mates today and less than 10 to my actual room mate. That’s not even normal. I just hope this year gets better or I’m not going to be able to do this anymore. I’m so depressed and lonely. But if this year doesn’t get better I don’t have any more options. I’m stuck. For the next four years. A person can be miserable for four years and survive right? I mean I’ll be home for the summers and winter and spring breaks and weekends when I work the maize in the fall. So it’s less than four years actually. I can do. I hope. It’s only four years. It’s only four years. It’s only four years. People say college is the best time of your life… they’re wrong it was high school and I wish I would have known that sooner.
You know I’m usually okay with the fact that I have no friends. But today all I wanted to do was go get some ice cream and I texted four people to see if they wanted too. Three of them were with other people and one was going to work. Hooray for being all alone. I’ll probably end up going by myself to go get the ice cream. Bye.
Never go to a 7/11 after midnight. It just screams bad news. Janelle, Sarah, Alec, Doug and I went into 7/11 to get Slurpee’s and this lady just starts talking to us. Okay, she’s just being friendly we think until she follows Alec and I to the back of the store then starts talking to all of us about college and asks us where we are going and what not. THEN she sees my phone and proceeds to ask what kind it is. Doug then is a douche and says here take a look. So she takes my phone right out of my mother fucking hand, it took a good 3 minutes to get it back. Jesus and then she proceed to talk to us until we left the store. The poor cashier said she had been in there for more than an hour. So moral of the story, stay away from any 7/11 after midnight.
Yesterday was so emotional for me. I never cry unless it’s related to books or movies, but I cried like a baby. Saying good bye to people I know I’ll never see again and realizing that me and my friends don’t have much time left before we all go our separate ways for college. Sure we can text, skype and hang out when we’re all home but it won’t be the same. I’m glad I made up with people who I really missed and I couldn’t be happier that she’s in my life again, I just wish it hadn’t taken a year and a half. I know who my true friends are and the ones that will forever be in my life forever, no matter the distance. Kayla, Janelle, Sarah, Meaghan, Meagan, Tyler, Sam, Brooke and Shannon; I don’t know where I would be without you guys. I love you to death ♥
I love that my one group of friends never asks me to hang out like at all anymore because they all are in relationships and I would always be the odd one out if we went any where. real cool, thanks. I know I mean a lot.